E-Mail from Grandma

A woman was at work when she received a phone call that her small daughter was very sick with a fever.  She left her work and stopped by the pharmacy to get some medication.  She got back to her car and found that she had locked her keys in the car.  She didn’t know What to do, so she called home and told the baby sitter what had happened.
  

Is - GOD GOOD - or what!?

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GODLY WAYS TO REDUCE STRESS …

 

 

An Angel says, ‘Never borrow from the future. If you worry about what may happen tomorrow and it doesn’t happen, you have worried in vain. Even if it does happen, you have to worry twice.’

 

1. Pray

 

2. Go to bed on time.

 

3. Get up on time so you can start the day unrushed.

 

4. Say No to projects that won’t fit into your time schedule, or that will compromise your mental health.

 

 

5. Delegate tasks to capable others.

 

6. Simplify and unclutter your life.

 

7. Less is more. (Although one is often not enough, two are often too many.)

 

8. Allow extra time to do things and to get to places.

 

 

9. Pace yourself. Spread out big changes and difficult projects over time; don’t lump the hard things all together.

 

10. Take one day at a time.

 

11. Separate worries from concerns .. If a situation is a concern, find out what God would have you do and let go of the anxiety . If you can’t do anything about a situation, forget it.

 

12. Live within your budget; don’t use credit cards for ordinary purchases.

 

 

13. Have backups; an extra car key in your wallet, an extra house key buried in the garden, extra stamps, etc.

 

14. K.M.S. (Keep Mouth Shut). This single piece of advice can prevent an enormous amount of trouble.    

 

15 Do something for the Kid in You everyday.

 

 

16. Carry a Bible with you to read while waiting in line.

 

17. Get enough rest.

 

18. Eat right.

 

19 Get organized so everything has its place.

 

 

20. Listen to a tape while driving that can help improve your quality of life.

 

21. Write down thoughts and inspirations.

 

22. Every day, find time to be alone.

 

23. Having problems? Talk to God on the spot. Try to nip small problems in the bud. Don’t wait until it’s time to go to bed to try and pray.

 

24. Make friends with Godly people.

 

 

25. Keep a folder of favorite scriptures on hand.

 

26. Remember that the shortest bridge between despair and hope is often a good ‘Thank you God.’

 

27. Laugh.

 

28. Laugh some more!

 

29. Take your work seriously, but not yourself at all.

 

30. Develop a forgiving attitude (most people are doing the best they can).

 

 

31. Be kind to unkind people (they probably need it the most).

 

32. Sit on your ego.

 

33 Talk less; listen more.

 

34. Slow down.

 

35. Remind yourself that you are not the general manager of the universe.

 

36 . Every night before bed, think of one thing you’re grateful for that you’ve never been grateful for before. GOD HAS A WAY OF TURNING THINGS AROUND FOR YOU.

 

‘If God is for us, who can be against us?’

 

(Romans 8:31)

 

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This is one of the best clean jokes
I’ve seen in a while!

             Jesus and Satan were having an
on-going argument about who was
better on the computer. They had been going at
it for days, and frankly God
was tired of hearing all the bickering.

             Finally fed up, God said, "THAT’S
IT! I have had enough. I am
going to set up a test that will run for two
hours, and from those results,
I will judge who does the better job."

             So Satan and Jesus sat down at the
keyboards and typed away.

             They moused.

             They faxed.

             They e-mailed.

             They e-mailed with attachments.

             They downloaded.

             They did spreadsheets!

             They wrote reports.

             They created labels and cards.

             They created charts and graphs.

             They did some genealogy reports

             They did every job known to man.

             Jesus worked with  heavenly efficiency

and Satan was  faster than hell.

             Then, ten minutes before their time
was up, lightning suddenly flashed across the sky, thunder rolled, rain poured, and, of course, the
power went off..

             Satan stared at his blank screen
and screamed every curse word
known in the underworld.

             Jesus just sighed.

             Finally the electricity came back
on, and each of them restarted their computers. Satan started searching frantically, screaming:

             "It’s gone! It’s all GONE! "I lost
everything when the power went out!"

             Meanwhile, Jesus quietly started
printing out all of his files from the past two hours of work.

             Satan observed this and became irate.

             "Wait!" he screamed. "That’s not
fair! He cheated! How come he
has all his work and I don’t have any?"

             God just shrugged and said,

             JESUS SAVES!!!

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A 54 year old woman had a heart attack and was taken to
the hospital. While on the operating table she had a near death experience.

Seeing God she asked ‘Is my time up?’

God said, ‘No, you have another 43 years, 2 months and 8 days to live.’

Upon recovery, the woman decided to stay in the hospital and
have a face-lift, liposuction, breast implants and a tummy tuck.
She even had someone come in and change her hair color and brighten her teeth!
Since she had so much more time to live, she figured she might as well make the most of it.
After her last operation, she was released from the hospital.
While crossing the street on her way home, she was killed by an ambulance.

Arriving in front of God, she demanded, ‘I thought you
said I had another 43 years? Why didn’t you pull me from out of the path of the ambulance?’

(You’ll love this)

- God replied: ‘I didn’t recognize you.’

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