Archive for the Tag 'God'

Feb 25 2008

Posted by Grandson under Humor, Reality

NOW WE KNOW!!

On the first day, God created the dog and said:

‘Sit all day by the door of your house and bark at anyone who comes in
or walks past. For this, I will give you a life span of twenty years.’

The dog said: ‘That’s a long time to be barking. How about only ten
years and I’ll give you back the other ten?’

So God agreed.

On the second day, God created the monkey and said:

‘Entertain people, do tricks, and make them laugh. For this, I’ll give
you a twenty-year life span.’

The monkey said: ‘Monkey tricks for twenty years?
That’s a pretty long time to perform. How about I give you back ten like
the Dog did?’

And God agreed.

On the third day, God created the cow and said:

‘You must go into the field with the farmer all day long and suffer
under the sun, have calves and give milk to support the farmer’s
family. For this, I will give you a life span of sixty years.’

The cow said: ‘That’s kind of a tough life you want me to live for
sixty years. How about twenty and I’ll give back the other forty?’

And God agreed again.

On the fourth day, God created man and said:

‘Eat, sleep, play, marry and enjoy your life. For this, I’ll give you
twenty years.’

But man said: ‘Only twenty years? Could you possibly give me my
twenty,the forty the cow gave back, the ten the monkey gave back, and
the ten the dog gave back; that makes eighty, okay?’

‘Okay,’ said God, ‘You asked for it.’

So that is why for our first twenty years we eat, sleep, play and enjoy
ourselves. For the next forty years we slave in the sun to support our
family. For the next ten years we do monkey tricks to entertain the
grandchildren. And for the last ten years we sit on the front porch and
bark at everyone.

Life has now been explained to you.

There is no need to thank me for this valuable information. I’m doing it
as a public service.

19 Comments »

Feb 03 2008

Posted by Grandson under Religion

Pastor has Guts!!

It seems prayer still upsets some people. Please read…
   

When Minister Joe Wright was asked to open the new session of the

Kansas Senate, everyone was expecting the usual generalities, but

                           This is what they heard;
 
 

                             "Heavenly Father,

                       We come before you today

                     To ask your forgiveness and

               To seek your direction and guidance.
 
 
 

                           We know Your Word says,

                         "Woe to those who call evil good"

                        But that is exactly what we have done.

                        We have lost our spiritual equilibrium

                           And reversed our values.
 
 
 

                         We have exploited the poor and

                             Called it the lottery.
 
 
 

                           We have rewarded laziness

                             And called it welfare.
 
 
 

                           We have killed our unborn

                             And called it choice.
 
 

                           We have shot abortionists

                            And called it justifiable.
 
 

                         We have neglected to discipline

                           Our children and called it

                             Building self esteem.
 
 

                            We have abused power

                             And called it politics.
 
 

                         We have coveted our neighbor’s

                         Possessions and called it ambition.
 
 

                            We have polluted the air

                             With profanity and

                           Pornography and called it

                        Freedom of speech and expression.
 
 

                           We have ridiculed the time

                            Honored values of our

                 Forefathers and called it enlightenment.
 
 

                             Search us, Oh, God,

                       And know our hearts today;

                       Cleanse us from every sin

                             And set us free.

                                    Amen!" 
   

                     The response was immediate.

                A number of legislators walked out

                     During the prayer in protest.
 
 

               In 6 short weeks, Central Christian Church, where Rev. Wright is

                Pastor, logged more than 5,000 phone calls with only 47 of those

                  calls responding negatively. The church is now receiving


                               International

     requests for copies of this prayer from India , Africa and Korea .
 

        Commentator Paul Harvey aired this prayer on his radio program, "The

      Rest of the Story," and received a larger response to this program than any 
                                

                                           other he has ever aired.
 
 

                With the Lord’s help, may this prayer sweep over our Nation and

              Wholeheartedly become our desire so that we again can be called

                                              "One Nation under God."
 
 

                 If possible, please pass this prayer on to your friends "If you

                       don’t stand for something, you will fall for anything."
 
 

            Think about this: If you forward this prayer to everyone On your

              Email list, in less than 30 days it would be heard by The world.
 
 

             How many people in your address book will not receive This

                         Prayer…..do you have the guts to pass it on?
 
 

                                                 I just did!

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Jan 26 2008

Posted by Grandson under Religion

THE LORD’S PRAYER

The Lord’s Prayer  Be sure to go all the way to see the new postage stamp!!!
 
 WOW !!!!!

I hope you enjoy this as much as I.   If God brings me to it, he will bring me through it.
The Lord’s Prayer  
 
During the next 60 seconds, Stop whatever you are doing, and take this opportunity.
 
(Literally it is only One minute!) All you have to do is the following: You simply say
 
"The Lords Prayer" for the person that sent you this message:

 The Lords Prayer  
 Our Father, who are in Heaven, Hallowed be Thy Name,
 
Thy Kingdom Come, Thy Will be done, on Earth as it is in Heaven.
 
Give us this day, our daily bread and forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who
 
trespass against us. And lead us not into temptation but deliver us from evil.
 
For Thine is the Kingdom, and the Power, and the Glory, forever.
 
Amen.  

Next, you send this message to everyone you know. In a while, more
 
people will have prayed for you and you would have obtained a lot of
 
people praying for others.
 

Next, stop and think and appreciate God’s power in your life,

 
for doing what you know is pleasing to Him.  


If you are not ashamed to do this, follow the instructions!
 

Jesus said, "If you are ashamed of me, I will be ashamed of you before My Father"
 

This is a simple test.
 
If you love God and you are not ashamed of
 
all the great things that He has done for you,
 
send this to everyone you know,
 
and the person that send it to you!!!  




 

God loves you and watches over you every day.

  If God brings me to it, he will bring me through it
 
—- Here is the new postage stamp that will be issued in September.  Isn’t it awesome?

READ AND RETURN (sorry - will not break this)  
May today there be peace within you. May you trust God that you are exactly where you are meant to be.
 
"I believe that friends are quiet angels who lift us to our feet when our wings have trouble remembering how to fly."  


Just send this to people and see what happens. Do not break this, please.

No Comments »

Jan 18 2008

Posted by Grandson under Humor, Religion

A change of opinion

An atheist is walking through the forest when Big Foot jumps at him. As he approaches menacingly, the atheist yells, “lord, save me!”.
Seconds later voice rumbles from heaven. “I thought you didn’t believe in me.”
“Well,” the man says, “until a minute ago I didn’t believe in Big Foot either.”

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