A Japanese doctor said, ‘Medicine in my country is so advanced that we
can take a kidney out of one man, put it in ano the r, and have him
looking for work in six weeks.’

A German doctor said, ‘That’s nothing, we can take a lung out of one
person, put it in ano the r, and have him looking for work in four
weeks.’

A British doctor said, ‘In my country, medicine is so advanced that we
can take half of a heart out of one person, put it in ano the r, and
have the m both looking for work in two weeks.’

A Texas doctor, not to be outdone said, ‘You guys are way behind. We
took a man with no brains out of Texas , put him in the White House and
now half the country is looking for work.’

BARACK OBAMA:
The chicken crossed the road because it was time for a CHANGE! The chicken wanted CHANGE!

JOHN MC CAIN:
My friends that chicken crossed the road because he recognized the need to engage in cooperation and
dialogue with all the chickens on the other side of the road.

HILLARY CLINTON:
When I was First Lady, I personally helped that little chicken to cross the road. This experience makes me
uniquely qualified to ensure right from Day One! — that every chicken in this country gets the chance it
deserves to cross the road.  But then, this really isn’t about me…….

GEORGE W. BUSH:
We don’t really care why the chicken crossed the road. We just want to know if the chicken is on our side of
the road, or not. The chicken is either against us, or for us. There is no middle ground here.

COLIN POWELL:
Now to the left of the screen, you can clearly see the satellite image of the chicken crossing the road…

ANDERSON COOPER – CNN:
We have reason to believe there is a chicken, but we have not yet been allowed to have access to the other
side of the road.

JOHN KERRY:
Although I voted to let the chicken cross the road, I am now against it! It was the wrong road to cross, and
I was misled about the chicken’s intentions. I am not for it now, and will remain against it.

NANCY GRACE:
That chicken crossed the road because he’s GUILTY! You can see it in his eyes and the way he walks.

PAT BUCHANAN:
To steal the job of a decent, hardworking American.

MARTHA STEWART:
No one called me to warn me which way that chicken was going. I had a standing order at the Farmer’s Market
to sell my eggs when the price dropped to a certain level. No little bird gave me any insider information.

JERRY FALWELL:
Because the chicken was gay! Can’t you people see the plain truth?’ That’s why they call it the ‘other side.’ Yes,
my friends, that chicken is gay. And if you eat that chicken, you will become gay too. I say we boycott all chickens
until we sort out this abomination that the liberal media white washes with seemingly harmless phrases like ‘the other
side. That chicken should not be crossing the road. It’s as plain and as simple as that.

GRANDPA:
In my day we didn’t ask why the chicken crossed the road. Somebody told us the chicken crossed the road,
and that was good enough.

BARBARA WALTERS:  Isn’t that interesting? In a few moments, we will be listening to the chicken tell,
for the first time, the heart warming story of how it experienced a serious case of molting, and went on to accomplish
its life long dream of crossing the road.

ARISTOTLE:
It is the nature of chickens to cross the road.

ALBERT EINSTEIN:
Did the chicken really cross the road, or did the road move beneath the chicken?

BILL CLINTON:
I did not cross the road with THAT chicken. What is your definition of chicken?

DICK CHENEY:
Where’s my gun?

AL SHARPTON:
Why are all the chickens white? We need some black chickens.