Archive for the Tag 'stupidity'

Mar 29 2008

Posted by under Humor

WHY SOME WOMEN STAY SINGLE

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4 Comments »

Mar 26 2008

Posted by under Humor,Reality

Wal-Mart Cake

I can see this Happening. 

 

It took me a second, but just read the story under the picture.  

 


Keep in mind – this actually really did happen.

 

This is someone who was moving from an insurance claims office.
 

Okay so this is how I imagine this conversation went:


Walmart Employee:   "Hello ‘dis be Walmarts, how can I help you?"


Customer: " I would like to order a cake for a going away party this week."


Walmart Employee:  "What you want on the cake?"


Customer:  "Best Wishes Suzanne" and underneath that "We will miss you".
 

STOP LAUGHING!

No Comments »

Mar 07 2008

Posted by under Humor

riddle

You are on a horse, galloping at a constant speed. On your right side is sharp drop off, and on your left side is an elephant traveling at the same speed as you. Directly in front of you is a galloping kangaroo and your horse is unable to overtake it. Behind you is a lion running at the same  speed as you and the Kangaroo.  What must you do to safely get out of this highly dangerous situation? If you do not know, see answer below.

Get your drunk ass off the merry-go-round!

1 Comment »

Mar 03 2008

Posted by under Humor

REAL 911 CALLS

          BELIEVE it or not, these are REAL 911 Calls!
 
 
Dispatcher : 9-1-1 What is your emergency?
Caller: I heard what sounded like gunshots coming from the brown house on
the corner.
Dispatcher: Do you have an address?
Caller: No, I have on a blouse and slacks, why?
 
 
Dispatcher: 9-1-1 What is your emergency?
Caller: Someone broke into my house and took a bite out of my ham and
cheese sandwich .
Dispatcher: Excuse me?
Caller: I made a ham and cheese sandwich and left it on the kitchen table
and when I came back from the bathroom, someone had taken a bite out of
it.
Dispatcher: Was anything else taken?
Caller: No, but this has happened to me before and I’m sick and tired of it!
 
 
Dispatcher: 9-1-1 What is the nature of your emergency?
Caller: I’m trying to reach nine eleven but my phone doesn’t have an
eleven on it.
Dispatcher: This is nine eleven.
Caller: I thought you just said it was nine-one-one
Dispatcher: Yes, ma’am nine-one-one and nine-eleven are the same thing.
Caller: Honey, I may be old, but I’m not stupid.
 
My Personal Favorite!!!
 
Dispatcher: 9-1-1 What’s the nature of your emergency?
Caller: My  wife is pregnant and her contractions are only two minutes
apart.
Dispatcher: Is this her first child?
Caller: No, you idiot! This is her husband!
 
And the winner  is……….
 
Dispatcher: 9-1-1
Caller: Yeah, I’m having trouble breathing. I’m all out of  breath.
Darn….I think I’m going to pass out.
Dispatcher:  Sir, where are you calling from?
Caller: I’m  at a pay phone. North and Foster.
Dispatcher: Sir, an ambulance is on the way. Are  you an asthmatic?
Caller: No .
Dispatcher: What were you doing before you started having trouble breathing?
Caller: Running from the Police.

20 Comments »

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